| Born To Dribble - Football Insults, Injuries, Chants & Gaffes |
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by Liam McCann - cartoons by Niki |
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Popular sports writer Liam McCann looks at the weird and funny sides of Soccer. This book is packed with facts about football history, its stars and characters, unusual events on and off the pitch ... He has sections on gruesome injuries - caused deliberately and accidentally ... There are club nicknames, songs and chants and throughout the book a huge selection of hilarious quotes by commentators, managers and players. You think you've heard them all before - well you haven't! "When you are 4-0 up, you shouldn't lose 7-1" Lawrie McMenemy "The Spaniards have been reduced to aiming aimless balls into the box" - Ron Atkinson "That decision, for me, was almost certainly definitely wrong" - Kevin Keegan "The underdogs will start as favourites for this match" - Craig Brown "I felt a lump in my mouth as the ball went in" - Terry Venables "You can't do better than go away from home and get a draw" - Kevin Keegan "We didn't underestimate them; they were just a lot better than we thought" - Bobby Robson from Chants chapter ... A player helped on his way out of Highbury was Frenchman Nicholas Anelka. He'd angered fans by signing for Manchester City but his replacement was ready to step in, as this ditty announces: "Chim-chimeney, chim-chimeney, chim-chim cheroo, who needs Anelka when we've got Kanu?" Patrick Vieira couldn't escape from Arsenal's denouncers either. Opposition fans taunted him with this, sung to the tune of Dean Martin's 'Volare': "Vieira, ooo-oooh! Vieira, ooo-oooh! He comes from Senegal, and his dad's a cannibal!" And the whole team have come under fire since manager Arsene Wenger signed a number of Frenchmen. Opposing fans delight in singing: "Who let the Frogs out? Who, who, who, who?" from International Abuse chapter ... Dutch fans are not likely to forget the occupation of their country by German forces during the Second World War. The invading army systematically confiscated their older relatives' most prized possessions, as this one liner bluntly announces: "My grandfather wants his bicycle back!" During a Chelsea - Galatasaray fixture the Blues' fans came up with these alternative lyrics to 'Go West' and it's other, arguably better known, variant: "You're Shish and you know you are!" from Football Legends: Sir Bobby Robson "Eighteen months ago they were one of the best three teams in Europe, and that would include Germany, Holland, Russia and anybody else you like" "He's very fast and if he gets a yard ahead of himself nobody will catch him" "Sarajevo isn't Hawaii" "Robert said I was picking the wrong team, and I was because he was in it" "What can I say about Peter Shilton? Peter Shilton is Peter Shilton. He has been Peter Shilton since the year dot" About The Author Liam McCann Liam McCann lives in rural Surrey near Guildford in the south of England, where he was born. Always a keen sportsman he was Surrey county champion in three of the athletics field events and won a British Universities Medal in 1993. He has a Bachelor of Arts degree in Sports Physiology and Psychology. Instead of finding work in the sports industry, Liam formed a rock band that toured Europe for four consecutive years. He is currently completing his second Ed Sampson adventure novel.
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